What in the hell exactly was going on in this special?
Fred Astaire, as the mail man narrator, was opening people's letters. That's a federal crime brother.
People just dropping off a baby at a home filled with elves. There wasn't one better home to drop off your unwanted child? Or maybe his parents were killed by the tyrant Burgermeister Meisterburger.
The Kringle elves had a terrible business plan. They kept making toys to be delivered to a town that specifically forbid toys. Enterprising elves would have made socks.
The horrible Winter Warlock crumbled when given a toy train. Good Lord, that's one weak warlock. Thankfully he held on to that magic feed corn.
Santa gains weight rapidly in all these specials. Like, 100 pounds in a couple days. I'd keep an eye on Mrs. Claus, she's after that insurance money.
Did you know ABC cuts out a couple of the horrible songs from the show while ABC Family cuts out the scene where the Burgermeister burns the toys in fear children will be traumatized? I prefer if they burned the song Jessica sings.
Well, show's over, getting ready for Monday Night Football. Let's see how the Bengals crap the bed in prime time again.
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